I noticed a Friend’s Facebook post while banging my head against the steering wheel waiting patiently in the car line today. It made me chuckle.

Ray has been dealing with both Ebola and Fearbola at work lately. Ebola is a scary, scary illness. Ray continues to assure me that when it’s time to worry, he’ll let me know. He also texted me a link to a zombie proof cabin today so who knows…

I’ve decided this afternoon that there are far more things that can cause me harm in my immediate vicinity. Here’s my list of 10 in no specific order. I’m not Letterman after all.

1. Mount Washmore… I can’t even begin to imagine the germs and bacteria that I come across in my piles of dirty underwear, soccer gear, sports bras, shin guard studded, beach bathing family’s pile of YUCK! Seriously. I wash my hands before during and after every single load. I have eyes. Those eyes may also need bleach. You can’t unseen some things people.

2. The giant cockroach or any other tropical creature… it won’t hurt me but trying to kill it I’m very likely to have some sort of horrific accident.

3. LEPTO…Not familiar with leptospirosis? You can find more info here. I’m pretty sure it took me down for about a week after running the Makahiki in the rain but I’m still signing up to do it again.

4. On any given day I think my bootcamp class might kill me and then it doesn’t.

5. Haole trips me, I’m pretty sure purposefully about 446 times a day.

6. Homework on a Monday could probably do me in. Emerging readers anyone? I have exactly two in my house. One thinks she can read Harry Potter, the other reads enough to surprise me but it is as slow as molasses in December.

7. The guilt from my mother… just kidding Mom. No I’m not, wait… Mom could kill me.

8. Parenting an almost 14 year old and a 12 year old, both in middle school suddenly seems far more dangerous in anything else at the moment.

9. I live in the land of volcanoes (mine are dormant) and tsunamis. This week we threw in a weak hurricane for good measure.

10. The thing that gets everyone in Hawaii… traffic. It’s not the accidents. It’s the stress of bumper to bumper headed to Pearl City for piano class after picking up kids from the hill in Aiea that will kill you!