I’ve been having some hard discussions with Mom about my old lady attitude, relationships and well heavier stuff… I’m sure there’s a blog post in there somewhere but it’s Monday and I’m barely hanging on by a thread so I thought I’d lighten it up a bit. I just wanted to share some things I heard in my house this weekend. I’m not talking about the fact that I need a decoder ring to figure out what my big girls are talking about like “he’s my bae” (He’s really cute) or “that’s so fetus.” (Younger and/or childish…I think.) Then there’s that whole “hashtagalexfromtarget” thing…

Here’s a sampling…

I mentioned running into a kid from their elementary school and that he’d changed. “I know! Puberty hit him like a truck!” 

“I am so so sorry if I ever made you watch Rolie Polie Olies.” 

“You need to pay for the cents Mom ’cause I have no cents.” (Older sister rolling on the floor) “Was that an intentional pun?” Thank you creative writing class… I have no idea where she gets it from.

After watching an episode of The Goldbergs where the Mom is super concerned that she will die old, miserable and alone, I asked Bria if she would take care of me when I’m old. Her immediate answer was “I’ll visit a lot.” Um, aren’t 7-year olds supposed to want to be with their parents forever? Mom still thinks 41-year olds should. 

“I’m glad Mom.” “What about, Jack?” “You.” Don’t get your warm fuzzies and awwwwww isn’t that sweets just yet. When Jack doesn’t like something and he knows he has to have it like say mashed potatoes, he’ll say, “I like mashed potatoes.” If he really wants to play Infinity and I say no electronics right now, he’ll say, “I don’t like Infinity.” The boy is a pro at faking it ’til he makes it. I gave him a kiss and a bear hug anyway.

I think I need to start taking notes. Kids really do say the darnedest things.